Perspectives

For the first time in a while, I don't hate my job.  I gave a presentation today to about 200 people.  Mostly engineers.  There were good questions at the end.  I was tongue-tied for the first slide or so, but warmed up after a bit.

I think I am over the whole decompression thing from my last job.  I guess, for a while, my ego was holding on to the whole lie of the American dream.  That effort is rewarded.

One look at my predecessor at the Navy would immediately absolve one of any such notion.

It also comes back to Wu Wei, but not exactly.   I don't think Wu Wei is achievable in a consumer-driven, capitalistic society.  The best you can do is a bastardized version, unless you are fortunate enough to have some nest egg to fall back on, which in effect negates the meaning.

It's also an ambition shift from work to personal life.  We all like to think that our work matters, but in almost every case this is patently false.  None of it matters, it's just noise.  A deep, insidious tone intended to rob you of your reason and keep your nose to the grindstone.

This is more difficult to accept than it sounds, even for a guy like me.

One unexpected side effect of lowering your personal expectations is the sudden appearance of freedoms you had not previously considered.  Without regard to income or perceived status, a huge number of choices appear.   Conversely, if one chooses to chase other misguided fools up an imaginary ladder, one has precious few options.   Worse yet, none of these options are appealing, at least to me, in any way. 

Up the ladder they are all the same, spewing the same putrid waste that I, personally, would rather not smell.

"Half your standard of living and double your quality of life."  PBS quote of the week.  That's what I need to do.  I have taken the first step, turning my back on advancement and embracing a more, let's call it "measured," approach.  I no longer object to the label mediocre.

The very idea of not lashing out at or caring about a world gone wrong.  It brings me peace.

To wrap up:  A call out to the ones who like to label themselves "exceptional" - come to me with your perspectives.  I'll break them in a week.